Comfort me

"Stupid! Stupid, stupid, stupid!!!" Aphrodite scoffed while stumbling home in the late night. It was almost morning, the sky was brightening up in the east and mist was dancing among the trees, drops of dew glimmering in the faint light like discarded pearls. She had messed up again! Just when she thought she had straightened out her love life had she gone ahead and made it all the more complicated. She couldn't blame the booze, or that Helios was as hot as the sun he was working with, nor could she blame being a newbie – she had been here at Olympos almost five years now. However it had been one of those nights when everything could happen – which it had too. Consequently this Goddess of Love stumbled and fell – right in the arms of the waiting sun god, who caught her in such a smooth and agile way it was impossible for her to wriggle out of his grip. Not because of lack of strength or skill from her side – but simple lack of restraint. Hence the battle had been a losing one before it even started. If there had been a battle, she wasn't even sure about it.

Hephaestos must have learned by now – and doubtlessly he was going to hold it against her tomorr... no, make that later today, she corrected herself as the first ruddy rays of the sun suddenly became visible by the horizon, hesitantly colouring the tree tops in front of her. The goddess turned and short-cut up one of those little marble staircases found more or less everywhere. After that she shot through the edge of the garden of Artemis, jumped a hedge and then crossing Nyx' lawn. From inside an open window laughter was streaming out, Nyx and a man – Ares. Well, at least he couldn't blame her for tonight's events, that was a minuscule comfort, he hadn't been happy when Aphrodite returned to Hephaestos eight months ago. But she wanted the safety and the stability provided by the blacksmith. She wanted someone who was there and who was ready to commit himself in a way Ares had proven unable to.

Then there had been Apollo – a mistake. Besides, it didn't really count, none of them had expected to end up on Kalymnos and none of them had expected the freak storm caused by some dire miscalculations of Zephyros' making. Zeus had chewed the Wind god up quite a bit afterwards but at that time Aphrodite and Apollo had already spent hours helping poor mortals to not have their ships sunken or roofs blowing off their houses – and when the work was done the two gods had been so exhausted that they had simply fallen into each other's arms. After that one thing led to another there in the temple of Apollo.

But this – this was different. This was a complete mess up from her side. She shouldn't have... How was she going to explain this to Hephaestos?

In that sense Ares had been easier, he didn't demand any extensive fidelity from her side. He knew it was possible to stray now and then, and he could forgive it, in case it was just a one-time slip and nothing long-lasting or done by purpose, to hurt the other one in a relation. Ares had been willing to accept some 'straying' now and then – but with Heph it was different. He wanted her complete attention and wasn't amused by her excuses. Being faithful in the way he desired – that was simply so hard!

"So what am I going to tell him?" Aphrodite asked herself as she hesitated by her own gate. On one hand - the best thing she could ever do was to head right home to Hephaestos and explain the situation, lay out her hand on the table and be frank about it. He was probably already up working anyhow, he was such a morning person! On the other hand - there was nothing she rather wanted than to go inside of her own house, pull the blanket over her head and pretend she was invisible. Make-believe it was possible to disappear to somewhere where no Olympians would ever find her. As if there ever had been such place. Even the dismal Hades was in their control. Beyond Hades were the Neverwhere lands. Yet they were held for being creepy beyond sanity, she had heard all kind of horrid stories about those daunting places.

In the end Aphrodite wasn't brave enough – or perhaps it should read 'dumb enough' - to confront her lover directly. She felt the she needed some reasonable 'protection' first. One sure way to acquire that was female allure as a distraction. Her forte! With a smile crossing her face she went inside and since there was no nymph around – the lazy bums were probably still asleep – she prepared her bath herself, filled it with perfume and herbs and washed herself as meticulous as possible, making sure every inch of her body was free of Helios' musky smell, every strand of hair was pristinely clean and her skin brushed rosy. Even if he was going to tell Hephaestos the truth, it didn't really had to be in his face.  

After having washed her hair twice, cleaned her private areas and feet, brushed her teeth with salt and gurgled in that minty concoction she had invented herself, she dried herself off completely, added perfume and dressed up in a peplos of iridescent white and pink with gold details and enhancing her slim waist with a golden belt. Then she pinned up her hair carefully before applying a perfect make-up and finally decorating herself with the earrings, rings, bracelets, ankle-rings and necklace in a set Hephaestos had made for her recently. That was a double benefit – she looked gorgeous wearing them plus he would be flattered seeing them being used and loved. Distraction! That's was a powerful weapon, Ares had told her once. And she sure was going to wield it!

Ares! Damnations! Too bad it didn't work...

One last critical look in the full body mirror, a slight correction of the khol around her eyes and then she was ready to take on the blacksmith.

Not a second too early apparently, there came an expected fast rap on her door.

"All right, here we go!" she murmured while heading down to answer the door, only to find that it had been thrown up and was now hanging on a single hinge as a well-known voice was barking her name.
"I'm here, Hephaestos," she replied using a honey-dropping voice full of kindness and love as she begun descending the curved stairs, her hand sliding elegantly down the railing, red painted nails gleaning in the early morning light streaming in from the door opening.
"Thanks," he said scornfully where he stood leaned against a pillar with his arms crossed over his powerful chest, aquamarine tunic straining over his muscles as if it was going to burst in its seems any moment.
"What?" she gently asked, noting with pleasure that he was taken aback by her appearance – if only for a fragment of a second before he composed himself again and resumed:
"I said 'thanks'. For not insulting my intelligence by trying to run off in hiding and instead being prepared to really talk things over instead."

"I thought that'd be reasonable," she answered as she took the final steps down the stairs and walked up to him, trying her best to not show the slightest of hesitation while struggling to read his face, read his mind. But he wouldn't let her.
"I'm disappointed in you," he finally said.

Disappointed! The word echoed in her mind. Disappointed! That was something you said to a kid who had been disobedient or a puppy that had done it on the carpet when he was supposed to have learned to wait until getting outside. Not something you said to a lover who had strayed. Somewhat it caught her off guard.
"About tonight?" she guessed, trying to steady her voice.
"Among other things," he replied and shrugged his shoulders. "But I guess I should expect nothing better from you, Aphrodite."
"Meaning what?"

"What am I to you really?"
"What do you mean, Hephaestos?"
"Exactly what I'm asking. Word by word. In plain Greek. What am I to you really?"
"You're my..."

"Oh don't say lover!" he unfolded his arms to raise a finger in the air towards her. "Don't say that word, because it's obvious that you do not mean it. You use it too easy. Throwing it around like litter. You call yourself 'Goddess of Love'! Bah! Goddess of selfishness would be a much better epithet for someone like you. Who's obviously only thinking about herself no matter what. Well fine! Keep it up if it fancies you! But remember one thing! Helios or whoever you turn to after me will only be amused by it for a while. Because soon enough they are also going to start asking for the real thing!"

"Are you finished?" she snapped when he made a move to turn his back and walk out of the door again.
"What does it look like?" a curt comeback.
"Fine. Because then perhaps I could say something."
"Go ahead if you think it helps a bit," he stopped and raised his cheek ever so slightly as if there was nothing in the world she could say that would really matter to him.
"I can at least try, Hephaestos. You see, it was not selfishness which made me stray tonight. It was loneliness. You asked me once to tell you off if you spent too much time working. Might that I take you up on that perhaps one day too late, when the damage is already done. However yesterday I felt so darn lonely when you disappeared right after dinner was over and couldn't bother to stay for a single dance, no matter how much you know that I love dancing. So I danced with some other gods instead. Including Helios. Then one thing led to another. I guess you may call it no excuse, or at least a lousy excuse, but it's the only one I have, Heph."

"I agree, as an excuse it sucks," the blacksmith huffed but he was listening, she could tell.
"Yes, hold it against me if you like. I won't duck. But keep in mind if you'd bothered to hang back just a little bit last night. For my sake. Then it wouldn't have happened!"
"I was tired, Aphrodite. I had been up working since..."
"That's also a lousy excuse. But I won't hold it against you if you don't hold Helios against me!"
"Now, what is this, really? An advanced try at blackmail?"
"No, only a try at taking a step back here and see that we were both at fault yesterd... let me finish," she raised her hand when he tried to interrupt her. "Perhaps one of us might've been misguided more than the other, but it'll do us no good trying to weight every misstep on some kind of scales. If we are to continue this..."

"Which I'm not so sure about..."
"...we will have to do it with open eyes and both of us will have to give as well as receive."
"So what you're saying is that if I hadn't been in such a rush back home you wouldn't have bedded Helios."
"Sort of. Hephaestos, can we forget this – and give it another try tonight? We stay for a few dances, then we go home together. And bed each other. After that we'll both get our beauty sleep."

Now she could tell that the god was wavering in his previously so firm resolution, so she walked up to him, made sure he could smell her perfume as she placed a well-manicured hand upon his stubbled cheek and tilted her head while she wet her lips ever so slightly.
"Please! We forget. Draw a thick line over yesterday. And begin anew. Heph, letting one single night destroy something which are so good and which has so much potential – it's not worth it, dear!"

Aphrodite became rewarded by Hephaestos leaning into her hand ever so slightly, and she knew she had won, even if he wasn't aware of it yet. But she had got him where she wanted, now she just had to play it a bit more so he thought the other way around, that he had gotten her where he wanted. She caressed him a little bit more, toe-tipping and placing a kiss upon his lips.
"You know, I'm so sorry, darling! I don't want to ruin this! Please..."
"Al right then," he sighed, battling inner emotions. "But tonight we go home together. Promise?"
"I promise, dear," she replied and placed a fingertip upon his nose. "And you'll promise me one dance?"
"I'm awkward on the floor."
"Well you won't get better if you don't practice," she smiled while continuing caressing him.
"I never have the time."
"Oh, come on!" she replied. "Ares have time. Then I imagine you could have as well."

Hephaestos huffed. If there was one thing in life he hated like nothing else so was it being compared to his older brother. Whatever Ares did Heph wanted to do either better or the other way around. However the goddess of love just beamed at him, knowing he was well on his way to get over it.

***

One dance – yeah, right – he had done it again! Disappeared as soon as dinner was over. Aphrodite had stopped just the slightest of moments to chat a bit with Iris and Persephone.
"You know he listens," the overjoyed messenger goddess said, placing her hands upon the shoulders of Aphrodite. Her pale blue eyes were shining with that kind of glitters saved for people in love and her cheeks were red like rose petals. "I've never encountered a man who listens before. Either they're silent as clams and you've no idea where their minds are. Or they all just talk talk talk. Blergh. In the end your ears start to chafe! I don't know what's worse really. But Zephyros. He listens, and he does it for real, not just out of politeness. For he cares."  

Iris went on repeating the same thing twice or perhaps trice more, then she had to tell it all to Demeter and Persephone too, who just closed in. It took just brief moments but when Aphrodite turned to look, her own beloved was nowhere to be seen. When she asked, Iris was just shaking her head, mind too occupied with Zephyros to even be bothered with someone else. So Aphrodite turned to Demeter and Persephone, but none of them had spied the blacksmith either. Naturally, they both guessed that he had dashed back to work again.
"But... he promised to dance with me tonight," Aphrodite felt her throat contract. No, she was not going to weep here and now. Turning to look once more she went on: "I'll better go find him."
"He might've just have gone to the men's room," Persephone tried to encourage her friend. "At least I'm going to dance a bit too. To be true, Hades is not much of a dancer either. Then again, there's no music down under."

Upon hearing the death god's name, Demeter huffed but her daughter paid her no heed. Aphrodite guessed Persephone was used to it now. At the same time she wondered when the mother was going to get over her daughter's marriage and start treating her son in law like something else than a dork and a nuisance. Maybe Demeter too needed some love in her life. Aphrodite decided to add that to her to-do list. A list that was getting longer and longer day by day now. Hemera, Athena, Artemis, Eos, Selene, Hermes, Apollo, Poseidon, Hestia... And there had to be something she could do to the royal couple as well – making Zeus appreciate his wife a bit more. However such a thing had to be administered carefully. Very carefully. None of these two could know she's been engaged in such a thing, manipulating them! But first and foremost – she had to fix her own love life. Or she would've very little cred when it came to involving herself in others! Fixing that included getting hold of Hephaestos. And doing it NOW! She couldn't believe he split! That would be so selfish of him! Almost as if he was asking her to once again find another lover for the night!

She came to glance over at the two Winds Amalkeides and Protokles and the latter was giving her an obvious look, his black eyes shining with lust as he strained up a bit more, pushing out his chest, trying to make it look more impressive.
"Forget it," she cursed under her breath. Any other night she might've been flattered by the attention he was giving her, now it only felt like a nuisance. Turning the other way she started to walk alongside a table where some deities had sat down for after-dinner drinkies while the Muses were beginning to play up for the first dance of the night. Now a familiar voice was calling her name. She turned:
"Hi Ares!"
"Care for a dance, baby?" he smiled and she almost felt her legs buckle beneath her. There was nothing she wanted more. But not with Ares. Not this time. Or perhaps... What the chaos – it was just a dance for fate's sake. Nothing anyone ought to question, not even Hephaestos if he should turn up.

"Al right!" she heard herself say as she held out her hand and the God of War stood up from his place. He laid his hands upon her hips and guided her out on the dance floor, where already Iris and Zephyros was swirling around, as were Athena and Helios, the latter duo distracting her a bit. They would be such a good-looking couple. If only she could... Again her mind returned to Ares, who caught her eyes with his and was relentlessly pulling her down down in that dark miasma of soft velvet. He kept her there while spinning her around on the floor, swiveling with the music, partly rising her from the floor now and then, breathing across her forehead while his hands almost indiscernible pulled her closer to his form, into the warmth of his beguilingly tender caress.

So it happened again, she was chanceless against the allure of this man. Aphrodite held no defense against Ares' strength and determination, of his hot and sensual way of slowly yet easily direct her where he wanted. Now she was lost again. Lost in his very being, incapable of breaking free, taking a step outside herself and look at what she was doing – again. Perhaps she would have – if her Hephaestos hadn't disappeared. If he had actually been there and bothered with what happened to the woman he was supposed to care about, the woman he was supposed to love. Of course she could break free on her own, she wasn't a weak person. However she guessed there was a slight disappointment in the back of her mind again, disappointment with a man who had promised to stay with her and dance that single dance. This very disillusion made her frustrated and vindictive –so Aphrodite chose to remain in the arms of Ares against better consideration, chose to play along when his lips met hers – and not only that, but to boldly lead the way into a deeper excursion of his body and mind.

Soon they found themselves moving away from the great semi-outdoors hall and the dance floor and out in the park, where there was privacy to be found in the dark. Privacy to explore and to rediscover each other. Aphrodite felt how truly she had missed it, how much she had missed this man and his smoldering hot touches and skilled kisses. He made her feel appreciated as a woman again, made her feel fully and wholly desired.

"Aphrodite," he lifted his lips from her cleavage long enough to say.
"Oh, Ares..."
"You are so desirable! How could I let you go?"
"How could I let you go?" she gasped in reply while winding her hands into his hair, burying her nose in it and inhaling the fragrance of him which was so very unique and which turned her on so very very much.
"I... " he began before he changed his mind and returned to kissing her. A hand undid the buttons along her left shoulder, and then it slowly lifted the textile of her purple peplos to uncover her breast, enabling him to taste the nipple with his eager lips, lubricate it and scratch it lightly with his teeth, making her moan with pleasure. Oh, this god! He was a miracle!

She traced her hands across his back, the brawny muscles notable through the textile –the next second she had wished it off him, a nice little trick of teleportation. Hephaestos had taught her that, something she didn't intend to tell Ares. Instead she giggled slightly at his surprised shock and then she begun to explore the naked him, letting her hands travel down so she could squeeze his firm buttocks.
"You're sure is full of surprises, Aphrodite! Have always been," he gasped and she giggled.
"That's the secret of my success, she joked."
"Well, two can play the game," Ares smirked and the next moment she found herself just as naked and with Ares easing his hand gently between her trembling tights, finding his way inwards to those hot, wet places of her.

At the same time he was falling backwards and landing gently with her in the grass beneath, scaring up a cloud of fireflies, as he slowly ended up on his back with her on top of him. It was there they made love, it was there she rode him to ecstasy, surrounded by a cloud of sparkling fireflies, which for some reason seemed content with circling around the two gods as they embarked upon their journey to event horizon together.

Afterwards, when they were both spent, the little insects drifted off to wherever fireflies go when the magic hypnotizing them is released. Now, she was lying on top of him, breathing gently in synchronicity with him, knowing that this was a night to remember, a moment to savour. For it was often best when two people had been away from each other and then met again.

***

"Okay, okay, okay, okay," Hephaestos held out his hands. Oddly enough it was he who appeared to be in a defensive mode today. Not accusatory, the way she had expected. While the manufacturer stumbled over his tries to explain away his disappearance yesterday, Aphrodite stopped listen and preoccupied herself with some sequins that had come off the bow of her peplos. It was starting to look shabby and she figured she should turn it over to the nymphs, see if they could fix it. Meanwhile she had to use her magic to make it look a bit more in order.
"So you're just fine with slipping away from your promises," she raged. "And leaving me stranded. Standing there in the large hall like some kind of set up loser who wants to dance with a man who obviously finds a new steering system for war chariots more interesting and more sexy than the poor lady he is so willing to abandon without even an excuse."

"Ehrm..." he tried to get in a word.
"Then I guess you're fine with letting this wretched, abandoned goddess dance with somebody else."
"Aphrodite, I said I was sorry!"
"And I say I'm not fine with 'sorry'. You complained yesterday that you were pissed because I had been with Helios. Well, if you don't want that to happen again, then you should pay a bit more attention to me!" She finished by hitting her thumb so hard in her cleavage it actually hurt, and in an odd way it made her feel better. As if that direct pain was taking her anguish away.

"So you didn't sleep with Helios again? Is that what you're saying."
"True!" In fact it was. Not with Helios...
"Great," he sighed with a relief she found strange. "Guess we're even then. You've overstepped and so have I. Can we perchance stop playing this game now. Be a bit mature you and I."
"Mature?" she echoed in disbelief, finding his choice of expression a bit – strange.
"Yeah, well..."
"Hephaestos. I'm fine with 'not playing this game'. But there's one thing you should know."
"What?" his nostrils flared slightly, he was on his guard now, she could tell. Not a good thing.
"Ares is still attracted to me."

"Oh, that asshole brother of mine," the manufacturer's eyes turned dark and his fists were balling. "One day I'm going to..." he stopped right there, he was smart enough to understand that he couldn't win over Ares in any kind of fight. His big brother was simply too good at all those disciplines. Instead he sighed deeply and opened up his fists again, taking a small step closer to her. "What must I do to get him off your mind, dear Aphrodite?"
"You can start with dancing with me tonight."
"There we go again."
"I simply love dancing that much. And in general, I want more of your time, more of your passion. Or you're going to end up in the same situation with me as with your ex-wife who was just walking out of you when she felt that you had neglected her one too many times. She wasn't content with seeking consolidation with one or another of your brothers. Or some other Olympian. She left. And Hephaestos, my patience is not eternal either."

"I know. I'll try to do better with you." Hephaestos reached out and took her in his arms, pulled her closer to himself and embraced her hard, like he was scared she would be whiskered away from him at any moment. Letting him almost suffocate her, Aphrodite returned the affection with her arms around his chest, knowing he needed this almost desperate display of affection right now. He needed to reassure himself she would his in spite of his earlier mistakes and in spite of the presence of Ares and the unrelenting attention he was paying her.
"Thanks dear," she whispered against his firm torso. "I love you so much. I hope we both can think before we act in the future. Avoid those mistakes again. Love is too vulnerable and it's so easy to destroy it if one is not careful."
"I know, I know," he whispered, running his hands through her blond locks, feeling the soft strands twirl between his fingers.

However as Aphrodite held on to Hephaestos, there was this thorn in her heart, this reminiscence of Ares and of his burning hotness and warm tenderness. She couldn't let go, there was no denying she had feelings for him too. She knew it could be too easy for her to slip back into his arms, becoming lost in his deep well of passion once more. Ares was simply almost irresistible and the events yesterday had shown her that she had no way of fencing him off, no strength to stand up against him. It just took his smile, the softness of his voice, the...

"No!" Aphrodite heard herself say, before she realized it.
"No what?" consternation was heard in Hephaestos' voice when he let go of her, surprised at her sudden expression of changed emotions.
"I am not going to destroy this, the things we have, because I'm week in spirit," she said, surprised by the tears forming in her eyes.
"You're not... weak in spirit," he whispered, voice suddenly filled with tenderness.
"I'm..."
"Dearest!" he stroke her gently over her hair.
"Heph, I'm so... comfort me, beloved, comfort me. Make me strong enough to stand firm in my love for you!"
 
He didn't answer her. Not using words at least, instead he just kept on holding her close to himself, sliding his arms across her back, one of them getting entangled in her hair as he pulled her head towards his chest. Then he was holding her so close she almost found it hard to draw breath, and the warmth of his body, his musky somewhat scorched smell was making her head spin.

Blinking against tears she rested her cheek upon his chest, knowing that the button she felt there was pressing a mark into her skin, like some temporary brand. An irregular and unconscious way of him to claim her.
"I love you, Heph," she whispered with her lips against his torso, aware of the fact that the sound was muffled by his form, and not caring that he might not be able to make those words out. In any case he should know what she was trying to say anyway.

And he did.
"I love you too, my rosa eglanteria," he whispered as he kept holding her close to himself. "I sure will comfort you, since it'll be a comfort for me too. My dearest..." the depth of his tenore di forza was reverberating against her chin and affecting not only her ears, but her whole form.

It was going to be fine again. Everything was going to be fine. She loved this man. Ares was just – well, passion. Pastime. Temptation. Something she would have to learn to face and to fight.